![]() Rancher Max Jameson, stunned by the unexpected death of his father, is determined to keep the family spread in Steamboat Springs, Colo., despite pressure to sell to a greedy neighbor. Publisher’s Weekly review of Nothing Sweeter: “The second entry in Drake’s Sweet on a Cowboy series (after The Sweet Spot) is another character-driven contemporary western with more heart than heat. Laura’s debut book in her Sweet on a Cowboy series, The Sweet Spot, has just been chosen as a double RITA finalist! Share the ‘before’ and ‘after’ in the comments, so we can all learn! Did you find any extraneous tags? Have you thought of any way to jazz them up and write them fresh? So, what do you think? have I convinced you to weed out dialogue tags?Ī WITS reader challenge: Read over a dialogue sequence you’ve written. I held on tight, trying to keep things from changing.” He looked down at his bloodless fists.īEFORE: “But if you don’t know all this about yourself, it doesn’t matter what I think,” He said.ĪFTER: “But if you don’t know all this about yourself, it doesn’t matter what I think.” He shut his mouth, closed his eyes, and grabbed for all the guts he had.ĪFTER: “Oh, Bree.” His words trailed off, as if he’d run out of breath.ĭo you see how the dialogue cue not only tellsyou whom is speaking, but showsyou how they’re saying it? It’s a perfect opportunity to get the reader on a deeper level, and to write fresh at the same time. I held on tight, trying to keep things from changing,” he said.ĪFTER: “I’ve hunkered down here for years with my hard, silent Dad. ![]() You tell me if they help:īEFORE: “We don’t need your boyfriend’s charity,” Max said.ĪFTER: “We don’t need your boyfriend’s charity.” His voice sounded like a peach pit in a garbage disposal.īEFORE: “I’ve hunkered down here for years with my hard, silent Dad. Here are some examples of my recent release, Nothing Sweeter, before and after adding the dialogue cues. It can add body movement – and give a glimpse into how a POV character, or better yet, a non-POV character is feeling. It cues the reader in as to whom is speaking, but then goes much farther, telling the reader how the line of dialogue is being said. You’ve heard that rich writing serves dual purposes, right? A dialogue cue does that as well. If you miss the class, you can always purchase the lecture packet. I’m not going to go into huge detail, because I want you to do your writing a favor and take her Writing Body Language and Dialogue Cues Like a Psychologist, course. My favorite writing teacher, Margie Lawson, suggests using what she calls Dialogue cues. You’re thinking this would be a lot of work? No way! This is where the fun is! Stephen King said, “The road to hell is paved with adverbs.” Word, Steve. Easy way to edit them out? do a ‘Find’ for ‘ly’. Nowadays, readers are much more sophisticated. I’d be willing to bet that the book was published before 1970. Yes, I know you could pick up a book in your library that has a line like, “How dare you?” She asked indignantly. Turn to the front of the book. This is the worst offender, and it’s seen as a newbie error. In conflict, nothing kills the tension like unneeded tags.Ĥ. ![]() ![]() ![]() But unless there are more than two people, you probably never need use the names after that.ģ. Of course they’re essential at the beginning of the scene, because we need to know who’s in it. I’ll bet you need them a lot less often than you think. If there is only a man and a woman in the scene, and someone says, “Excuse me, I have to go to the ladies room.” do you really need a tag? Many times the dialogue itself cues the reader.Ģ. I’m always surprised by how many NYT authors have tons of unnecessary tags. The ONLY time you need a tag is if the reader wouldn’t know who was speaking otherwise. Yes, I know they say, ‘He said/she said’ are invisible to the reader.Įven if you don’t share my pet peeve, why settle for something so boring? You write a sparkling line of dialogue, and slap ‘he said’ on the end? Why not continue the sparkle instead?īut first, a few rules of dialog you may or may not be familiar with:ġ. ![]()
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